Trey Parker And Matt Stone

Suggested By: Chris Barnes (Facebook)

Past Form: Parker and Stone haven't got much in the way of presenting experience (though they did co-host the 1998 Creative Arts Emmys, which counts for almost nothing, much like the awards themselves), but they're certainly outspoken, smart (and smart-ass) talkers.

Show Highlights: Word of warning to the awards producers, though - you're gonna need a seven MINUTE delay, let alone a seven second one.

But wouldn't it be fun to see thesping types they've insulted over the years challenge them to gladiatorial combat on stage? Even if it's just with giant foam sticks…

Sample Speech: "And now, the required political bit. (As Sean Penn) Last year I went to Iraq. Before Team America showed up, it was a happy place. They had flowery meadows and rainbow skies, and rivers made of chocolate, where the children danced and laughed and played with gumdrop smiles."



Kevin Smith

Suggested By: Mark Jones (Facebook)

Past Form: Smith's had one or two minor hosting gigs in the past, but where he's really worked is in his live Q&As, where he takes questions from the audience. Rambling and hilarious, he has to be experienced to be believed.

Show Highlights: Like Parker and Stone, he'd need a swear button, but he could bring on some more famous friends - like Ben Affleck - to help out with the wattage of the night.

It would be the first ever Oscars where the host opens the event with a monologue entirely dedicated to A) anal fissures and B) anal sex with his wife. Wait… Didn't David Letterman do that already?

Sample Speech: "That's why you'll never see my name next to Scorsese, Woody Allen, and Spike Lee. Scorsese speaks a lot at NYU, and I'm damn skippy no one's ever been like, 'I'll suck your d**k for five bucks!'"



Neil Patrick Harris and Nathan Fillion. In their Dr Horrible costumes.

Suggested By: FreddieBoz, Ross Davidson, Chris Barnes, Scott Mason (Facebook)

Past Form: NPH has been blazing a path through awards show hosting duties - with great performances on the Tonys and the Emmys under his belt. Fillion is simply charm personified.

Show Highlights: Think Hugh Jackman did a lot of musical numbers? Imagine the whole show like that. NPH is a broadway veteran and Fillion can carry a tune, so if they recruit a few more singing thesps, it's a whole musical!

Might have to make an exception for the acceptance speeches, though.

Sample Speech: "It's curtains for you, academy president. Lacy, gently wafting curtains."

Next: Bruce Campbell, Quentin Tarantino