It’s brilliant that Scarlett Johansson has decided to pose as Marilyn Monroe for a D&G ad campaign, really, she looks great.
However, like so many sexy actresses before her, Johan seems to think that a bit of curly blonde hair, some red lippy and a white bed-sheet is enough to channel the sexiest starlet of all time.
Sadly it’s not. Look at the shot below. If someone told you she was aping Madonna, you’d probably believe them.
Unfortunately, she’s not the first. We’ve gathered together Jessica Alba, Nicole Kidman, Megan Fox and more sexy starlets to judge their attempts to do Marilyn. Some work. Most fail.
The Jessica Alba Tribute
The Prosecution: We bet you’ve spotted the first problem here. Wheareas Marilyn wasn’t afraid to get her tush out, Jessica is a bit more shy. But if you’re going to do something, Jessica, do it properly.
The Defence: Alba dyed her hair blonde, which is commitment to the concept. Or a clause in her Fantastic Four contract. Either way, it looks good.
The Verdict: Not guilty. The coyness adds to the sexiness of the shot, and even Monroe would be proud of the gleam in Jessica's eyes.
The Lindsay Lohan Tribute
The Prosecution: Our main problem with this one is Lohan’s wig; it's just so damn dodgy. We don’t expect our tributes to be match-cut likenesses, but finding a hairpiece that fits would probably be a good start.
The Defence: Hiring Bert Stern to recreate his classic Monroe photoshoot 46 years after he first shot it was a good idea.
Our Verdict: Guilty. Monroe's eye contact is so powerful in this shot she's practically 3D. Lohan, on the other hand, looks a bit embarrassed. She should be. That wig's awful.
The Mischa Barton Tribute
The Prosecution: Marilyn Monroe was a size 12 stunner. Mischa Barton? More like a size zero. Whereas Monroe looks confident and proud in her metallic number, Barton looks a little lost and dwarfed by her dress. Also, it’s another rubbish wig.
The Defence: Um, the wig’s parted to the right side?
The Verdict: Guilty. Barton looks like a kid playing dress-up, not an iconic sex symbol.
The Megan Fox Tribute
The Prosecution: We can't be too hard on the picture itself. But Megan, you’ve got a permanent tribute to Mazzer on your arm (see below), but you won’t dye your hair blonde for a photoshoot? For shame.
The Verdict: Not guilty. If she had blonde hair, lay down and shifted her arms a bit, this would be perfect. And you've got to respect anyone who loves Monroe so much she's prepared to get inked in her honour.
The Nicole Kidman Tribute
The Prosection: It’s yet another shot that doesn’t directly copy an iconic Marilyn moment, throwing enough Monroe objects into the shot and hoping they stick. Yes, it’s got the blonde hair. Yes, Monroe liked fur rugs. And yes, she had a predilection for pink. But pearls?! Diamonds were Marilyn’s best friend, you ninny!
The Defence: The defence rests.
The Verdict: Guilty. We wouldn't be able to put Kidman into a line-up of Monroe impersonators if you offered us a date with Jessica Alba as a reward.
The Drew Barrymore Tribute
The Prosecution: Proof positive that Monroe tributes haven’t come very far in the past 15 years. Like Scarlett Johannson’s photographer, Drew’s seems to think that curly blonde hair, a bit of red lippy and a white bed-sheet is enough to channel the sexiest starlet of all time. It’s not.
The Defence: At least she got there before Scarlett.
The Verdict: Guilty. Now, we're off to watch Some Like It Hot. Again.