80 Awesomely Bad '80s Video Covers
The best/worst cassette classics
BY Oct 9th 2009 12:12PMFILED UNDER: Features
User Comments (6)
Downloads, DVD, and Blu-ray are all very shiny and convenient, but we do miss the '80s indie video shop...
Tawdry treasure caves of knock-offs, 'nasties' and oddities bashed out on the cheap by tiny production companies chasing the 'home entertainment' gold rush...
So, today, we celebrate our independence days, with the best of the worst of the VHS/Betamax era...
The Alternative
Sensitive! Provocative! Umm, a cheap statue of a urinating boy that can be found in any garden centre!
Angry Joe Bass
Shotgun and chainsaw! Hell hath no fury like a fisherman who hasn't caught much.
The Arousers
Badly drawn woman rummages around inside her head while awkwardly reclining on a fence. Hot enough for ya?
The Asphyx
Beware the killer dish-rag!
Battle Of The Bullies
But surely now the bullied has become the bully? Uh, with the help of a mighty flag-waving army found in all '80s schools.
The Best Of Sex And Violence
Yeah, but sex or violence first? Ah, dry ice... '80s win.
The Black Cat
WHERE IS THE CAT?
Body Parts
Constipated Marilyn Monroe lookalikes must be stabbed! Unrelentingly!
Next: Body Shop, Fat Ethel II
Print Comments (6)
1: SCY385 says
These video covers are pretty bad but these titles are too. DAMN! 'Who Killed Mary What's 'Er Name?' That's just wrong on soooooo many levels.
Posted: Oct 12th 2009 // 9:50PMAlert a moderator
2: irish says
I thought the nail gun joke was funny.
Surely the guy at the back on the warbus poster is David Duchovny
Posted: Oct 13th 2009 // 12:33AMAlert a moderator
3: docemmettbrown says
Ah memories.
Great article guys! Poor David Carradine.
Posted: Oct 16th 2009 // 11:46AMAlert a moderator
4: Mozkiwi says
Naw... you got it wrong, the guy at the back on the Warbus poster is George Michael, without his sunglasses.
Wonder what happened to most of those actors...
Thanks - I had a good laugh...
Posted: Oct 18th 2009 // 7:23AMAlert a moderator
5: rxillos says
Well, it's pretty easy to criticize the cover art but you should be aware of the factors behind it's creation...
I am the guy they hired to come up with the cover image. Quick turnaround. No reference other than a copy of the vid and the budget was equally bad as the movie! That was a long time ago. I'm glad to be out of that business and onto better jobs! :/
Posted: Feb 28th 2010 // 8:38AMAlert a moderator
6: rxillos says
Above comment - referring to Nail Gun Massacre. (Didn't realize all 8 films share the same comments)
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