The Executioner
Erm... 'Fingered' by The Godfather? Then 'nailed' by The Executioner?
The Executioner 2: sodomised by The Terminator, tromboned by The Equaliser...
Flesh Eating Mothers
Is that training-shoe stew? And who bit off more than they could chew, anyway? The mothers? Or the people whose flesh the mothers are eating? Grammatical clarity, people!
Frozen Terror
The look on his face barely screams terror, more bewilderment. Also this is a fridge. The title should be 'Chilled Bewilderment'.
For a busy serial killer type, this guy has a remarkably well-stocked fridge, though everyone know you never keep the fresh veg and the severed head together!
Galaxy Invader
Creature from the Black Lagoon with Han Solo's blaster and the plot of Predator. Why isn't Don Dohler running Hollywood?
The Girl In Blue
Is that her? He should probably keep looking...
Gold Runner
What? Looks like the box art of a bad ZX Spectrum game. Also, it appears that the lead actor is named 'Richard Loser' - after this, he probably should be.
Guess What We Learned In School Today?
Um... how to take a bra off? That is a lesson TotalFilm.com would have definitely attended. Taught!
Horror Planet
Where's the Planet? Is it tiny? Invisible? Is it claw shaped? What's with the Wonder Woman headband on the disembodied space-eyes? What is that laser doing to those women? Too many questions!!!
Comments
SCY385
Oct 12th 2009, 21:50
These video covers are pretty bad but these titles are too. DAMN! 'Who Killed Mary What's 'Er Name?' That's just wrong on soooooo many levels.
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irish
Oct 13th 2009, 0:33
I thought the nail gun joke was funny. Surely the guy at the back on the warbus poster is David Duchovny
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docemmettbrown
Oct 16th 2009, 11:46
Ah memories. Great article guys! Poor David Carradine.
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Mozkiwi
Oct 18th 2009, 7:23
Naw... you got it wrong, the guy at the back on the Warbus poster is George Michael, without his sunglasses. Wonder what happened to most of those actors... Thanks - I had a good laugh...
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rxillos
Feb 28th 2010, 8:38
Well, it's pretty easy to criticize the cover art but you should be aware of the factors behind it's creation... I am the guy they hired to come up with the cover image. Quick turnaround. No reference other than a copy of the vid and the budget was equally bad as the movie! That was a long time ago. I'm glad to be out of that business and onto better jobs! :/
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rxillos
Feb 28th 2010, 8:44
Above comment - referring to Nail Gun Massacre. (Didn't realize all 8 films share the same comments)
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