Bruno is out this week (you might have noticed). So we’re hosting a movie-costume fashion fisticuffs extravaganza-bonanza. Thing...

A flair for fabrics is the only fighting pedigree necessary to compete, and the words 'TK Maxx' might just get you killed.

Enough of the chit chat. Bring on the costumery!

Barely-There Costumes

Barbarella (Jane Fonda) Barbarella (1968)

Boy, the Galaxy must be a pretty hot place, as Barbarella spends more than a little time running around sans clothing - perhaps it's all the fur lined spacecraft... or the copious amounts of sex.

When she does put something on, it’s often so tiny it can barely be called an outfit… then again, she’ll be out of it again soon.

Built-In Nipples That Predate Joel Schumacher Factor: 10

Not As See-Through As We Had Hoped-ness: 8

Cool Costume Rating: 9

Beaten into kinky submission by…

Loana (Raquel Welch) One Million Years BC (1966)

There are no practical reasons for anyone, even a million or so years ago, to wear so little, but this is the movies! Practical is null and void, and thankfully so.

Wearing only the fur of a small ferret, Welch is blissfully unaware of any Ice Age rumors, and was probably the reason the dinosaurs died out, running around like that…

Just What Animal Did That Used To Be? Factor: 9

Responsibility For One Million Erections-ness: 10

Cool Costume Rating: 10

Next: Royal Costumes