It's Potter time again, and to celebrate, we're launching a battle that will make the Tri-Wizard Tournament look like... the... er... Bi-Wizard Tournament? Needless to say, it will be awesome.
In a hotpot of hocus pocus hardmen, this battle sees magicians from the movies face off against the stars of Saturday Night television, Las Vegas, and dubious publicity "stunts".
It's a sorcery styled smackdown, and it's starting... now!
British Magicians
Harry Potter (Daniel Radcliffe) The Harry Potter Series (2001-)
Titular student of wizardry at Horwart’s, Potter is also believed to be the chosen one, who will defeat the evil Lord Voldemort and vanquish dark magic.
Along with friends Ron and Hermione, Harry has survived 6 years of school and several attempts on his life, and he’s going to need to use that experience going up to survive this battle.
Sex? No. Drugs? No. Not A Normal Teenager Then?-ness: 10
Didn't you get In Your Kit Off In Equus? Really? Ew. Factor: 10
Magician Rating: 9
vs.
Paul Daniels
Staple of British magic and entertainment for over 40 years, Daniels starred in his own show on the BBC between 1979-1994.
Married to assistant Debbie McGee, he has garnered numerous awards and an international following, though his popularity has waned in recent years…
So Debbie... What's All That About Then? Factor: 10
Didn't You Used To Wear A Wig?-ness: 9
Magician Rating: 9
Let Battle Commence!
Quick off the mark, young Potter surges forward, but trips over a shoe lace, which he still can’t tie.
Daniels pulls a rabbit out of a hat, screaming “You’ll like this, but not a lot” and hurls it at the boy – but it simply bounces off, causing no damage.
“Here’s one you can’t do” shouts Potter distracting Daniels by grabbing his full thick head of hair, and pulling it, taunting the balding magician.
It looks like Daniels has had enough though, and gets assistant Debbie McGee to flash the youth.
Potter, never having seen breasts before, is distracted long enough for Daniels to deliver the killer blow, slicing him neatly in half with a prop-saw.
Paul Daniels emerges victorious.
Movie Magicians 0 Real Magicians 1
Next: Cocky American Magicians
Comments
Wintermute
Jul 14th 2009, 12:21
One tiny thing, guys ... Paul "Bunco Booth" Daniels is actually married to Debbie MCGEE and NOT Debbie Gibson ... SHE is the former singer/songwriter and recent star of "Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus" ... now THAT'S magic!!
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dgoodswen
Jul 14th 2009, 12:34
Fixed, thanks. She's a hard lady to get out of your head, that Debbie Gibson... can't say the same for Mega Shark...
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