How To Reboot Star Wars
Coming soon to a galaxy quite like this one...
By Simon KinnearJul 6th 2010Hope Confirmed
December 2014 - What were we worrying about?
The new, New Hope is everything Reign Of The Emperor promised and more. It's the original film, remixed in Blomkamp's darker, more realistic aesthetic, with Vader's interrogation of Leia so frightening that many call its 12A certificate unacceptable.
And yet, it's a funnier film, too, guided by the light and shade of the '80s sequels, with Mia Wasikowska's fiery Leia widely considered to be the film's break-out star after a muted turn in Reign Of The Emperor.
The film hits the ground running, with Luke and Kenobi tussling for ownership of the droids during the first ten minutes, and the action arriving at the Death Star after only half an hour. From there, the film offers surprising but sensible detours from Lucas' template, including a deeper role for Caine's charismatic C3PO... who, despite the implications of the trailer, isn't a traitor: he's bluffing.
Even the sceptics are quiet this time, and A New Hope trounces the six-month-old box office record set by Reign Of The Emperor, as well as making it to the top of the IMDb 250.
Meanwhile, plans are afoot for Blomkamp, Nolan and Abrams to turn their attentions to The Empire Strikes Back...
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Comments
RaveyDaveyGravy
Jul 6th 2010, 12:52
that was fun, now make it lads!
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Hadouken76
Jul 6th 2010, 14:10
does he have a beard to seperate his face from his neck? take it away and he looks like a cokk with glasses..lol (sorri TF!)
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BiDDY
Jul 6th 2010, 20:59
This is one of the funniest things I have read on your site.......Absolutely hilarious!!!, also wouldn't suprise me if it was a close prediction. "Christian is here to try out new things, and a Wookie is something he's never played before." PURE GENIUS!!!!!!
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Monkeynuts30
Jul 7th 2010, 0:56
Let us all pray to the gods of celluloid this isn't a self-fulfilling prophecy. I'd set up www.dontrapeourchildhoodagain.com myself
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dalebiskit
Jul 10th 2010, 18:32
*why is george lucas so intent on being a tool? has he actually done anything good in decades? *if this isn't another classic TF hoax
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pequaboy
Jul 13th 2010, 17:30
JK Rowling's Potter franchise surpassed his Star Wars, and in less time. Cameron, whom I despise will undoubtedly pass him on the financial scale. Lucas' arrogance forces him to climb back to the top the only way he knows how. Star Wars was very lucrative in it's time and it's the only platform he knows. Personally, I was never impressed by Star Wars anyway.
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DarthCorleone
Jul 13th 2010, 21:44
I was compelled to register for this site solely to let you know that this reboot fantasy - while imaginative and entertaining to read - made me want to vomit.
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skyeditor
Jul 13th 2010, 23:05
Im with Darth on this one! Interesting industry satire yet somehow fundamentally unnerving. And made my stomach churn
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Ken55555
Jul 14th 2010, 5:03
First off.....FU totalfilm.com, you have nothing good to say about anything. Your site is so full of c**p it's not funny. I was linked here from another site and took a look around. I can fit what you know about movies on the head of a pin!!! As for star wars and George Lucas, give it a rest....we get it. You are soooo sad the new movies where not what YOU wanted....boo hoo hoo. The man made the movie HE wanted, get over it.
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