You travelled out to the US just as Barack Obama was heading for the White House. His election was a huge breakthrough for minorities in America. How hot is Barack?

Firstly, ich vant to say zay I find Obama an inspiration – it gives me hope zat, after years of struggle, someone can at last get to ze White House, despite being incredibly hot.

But he has GOT to lose America’s First Beard, Michelle! Shtop hanging round Barack! Firstly, he’s so HOT he makes you look frumpische und secondly just cos he had sex with you on two occasions 10 un eight years ago to further his career, it doesn’t mean you’re going to turn him.

Let him go! If he wanted a beard, he’d grow one!

But sadly, on the day of Obama’s election, Californians voted in favour of anti-gay marriage Proposition 8 – something you rallied against. What can Bruno do to change people’s opinions?

I have faith in the politicians to ultimately do ze right thing. Zere vas a time many years ago, when people laughed and said “Zis Austrian tough guy can never become a well loved and respected politician’, but Adolph proved zem wrong and so has Arnold Schwarzenegger!

Ich don’t think I could ever marry after vot happened to my first real boyfriend, Jesper Klindl. I really don’t want to talk about him, or what happened after ich broke up with him. He killed himself.

In ze note he left, ich vas mentioned five times – his mother vas only mentioned once! No big deal, vassever. Did I mention he killed himself because I dumped him? He said life vasn’t worth living mit out me, und he clearly meant it!

I remember his funeral – ich vore ze most AMAZING floral print shirt over zese BEAUTIFUL fawn buckskin hipster pants. I looked great!

While on the subject of politics, Arnold Schwarzenegger is a fellow countryman of yours, in power over in the USA. Is he a bit of a God in your country?

Arnie is highly respected in Austria, as is his brother Harald, who is one of Vienna’s most celebrated patisserie chefs. His zwetschgenfleck ist amazing und you’ve never tasted a cremeschnitte like his!

He makes only 18 cakes a year und zey cost 9,000 euros each. You can order what you like from him, but you won’t get it. P Diddy once ordered a Marillenknodel, and 18,000 euros and two months later he got a palatschinken!

Ich personally am hoping to become ze biggest gay Austrian celebrity since Arnold.

Next: Shag, Marry, Kill