Movie Characters After The Credits Roll

From Bickle to Bateman… what happened next?

 

Ever wondered what movie characters get up to once the curtain comes down? If you said 'Movie characters are fictional representations and exist only in the medium of celluloid' then you are wrong. Epic fail, douche.

Movie characters are alive and well and living in the ether, and thanks to massive amounts of caffiene based carbonated soft-drinks totalfilm.com consume on an hourly basis, we are in the know about exactly what your favourite movie characters got up to next.

Sit back and prepare to be slightly entertained as we exclusively reveal Movie Characters After The Credits Roll...

 

Travis Bickle

The Character: Insomniac taxi driver with a penchant for violent confrontation and cleaning up the mean streets, last seen dropping off former flame Betsy and driving away into the night.

2 Minutes After The Credits:
Donut time. Bickle heads to get a dozen of New York’s finest and ends up wasting a pair of would be robbers.

2 Years After The Credits:
Using his past media exposure as a platform, he runs for Mayor, on a zero-tolerance crime ticket. He isn’t elected, and fails again to woo Betsy. Shoots a couple of people in frustration.

20 Years After The Credits: Lives in a basement apartment and runs the blog iOwnTheNight.com, a place for promoting his vigilante agenda.

Spends most of his time on Twitter, and recently left Facebook because it has become scum ridden.

Next: ET[page-break]

 

ET

The Character: Extra Terrestrial youth left stranded on Earth by negligent parental units. Befriends a kid, and goes on the run from the feds and NASA before making Drew Barrymore cry by leaving.

2 Minutes After The Credits:
Scolded by his parents, ET is left with a rawhide after a quick spanking from those devastatingly large palms.

2 Years After The Credits:
ET becomes the first extra terrestrial to ever successfully sue his parents for neglect and is granted legal emancipation. Uses the money to buy a house and throw epic parties.

20 Years After The Credits:
Reformed wild child ET returns to Earth in disguise and befriends an adult Elliot. Together they travel to Africa and set up a Humanitarian aid charity.

Using his fully matured healing powers, ET saves countless lives. A visit from Drew Barrymore leads to a brief relationship, but once again ends in her tears and his leaving her for someone hotter.

Next: Butch and Sundance[page-break]

 

Butch and Sundance

The Characters: Wild West outlaws and heterosexual life partners who robbed, stole and cheated their way across 19th century America. When a posse of lawmen are sent to hunt them down, the pair flee to Bolivia.

2 Minutes After The Credits: Inexplicably, the Bolivian Army are a terrible shot, and fail to kill the duo, who play dead until the troops leave.

They tend their wounds and make their way to pastures new…

2 Years After The Credits:
After an extended journey involving boats, horses and cannibals, the pair arrive at their final destination; Australia.

20 Years After The Credits:
Butch is elected Prime Minister and appoints Sundance as his number two.

The pair lead Australia into the new century, dispelling the stereotype that it’s a country of thieves run by criminals.

Next: Lt. Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell[page-break]

 

Lt. Pete 'Maverick' Mitchell

The Character: Ace pilot who flies by the seat of his pants and into the hearts of movie-goers everywhere, Maverick becomes the kind of flyboy his Dad would have been proud of, and gets the girl.

2 Minutes After The Credits:
Maverick takes Charlie into the bathroom for the kind of steamy sex what people have in public toilets. As soon as they start going at it, everything turns very blue for no reason.

2 Years After The Credits: Charlie leaves after one of Maverick’s trademark passes at the Admiral’s daughter, who turned out to be the Admiral’s son.

Fearing accusations about his sexuality, Maverick does what any sane fighter pilot would – he joins the Church of Scientology.

20 Years After The Credits: Maverick is an instructor at Top Gun, when a cocky young flyboy arrives for his training.

Seeing a part of himself in the young lieutenant, Maverick realizes that Scientology has no cure for man love after all. Thank God.

Next: Major Alan 'Dutch' Schaefer[page-break]

 

Major Alan 'Dutch' Schaefer

The Character: Special Forces Commando who eats iron for beakfast and hates to wear sleeves. Beats the shit out of an alien who killed his men because the alien couldn't understand a word he was saying and got confused.

2 Minutes After The Credits: On the chopper, doing bicep curls. Anna throws herself at him, but he prefers lifting weights. ‘It’s like coming over and over again’ he tells her.

2 Years After The Credits: After leaving the Armed forces, Dutch carves out a career for himself in Hollywood, where due to his vast size and limited accent and acting range, he becomes famous for playing a robot.

20 Years After The Credits:
Runs for Governor of California, is elected despite sounding like an Austrian dictator and having fairly extreme right wing policies for such a liberal state.

But when those ugly motherf***ers return to Earth, Dutch resigns his post, straps on unnecessary amounts of weaponry and wades into the jungle for one last showdown.

Next: Somerset and Mills[page-break]

 

Det. Somerset and Det. Mills

The Character: New boy in town Detective Mills is shown the ropes by retiring Dick, William Somerset.

The pair become involved with sadistic serial killer John Doe, culminating with hot head Mills shooting him while in police custody.

2 Minutes After The Credits: Somerset watches Mills being arrested, and calls the chief to withdraw his retirement plans/renounces Fed-Ex.

2 Years After The Credits: Mills is given a suspended sentence after a lengthy trial that calls into question police procedure and the rules governing suspects in custody – like not taking them on goose hunts.

Somerset finally retires, after seeing justice served.

20 Years After The Credits: Mills and Somerset write a script about a serial killer who uses the seven deadly sins as his MO. Hollywood thinks it sounds generic and passes.

Next: Patrick Bateman[page-break]

 

Patrick Bateman

The Character: Unhinged Wall Street banker who epitomizes everything that’s wrong with Reagan’s 1980s consumerist nightmare.

2 Minutes After The Credits:
Returns some videotapes, even though he doesn’t remember renting any.

2 Years After The Credits:
Invests in a little something called the DVD much to the amusement of his peers. Has a set of business cards printed that states Patrick Bateman, Murders and Executions.

20 Years After The Credits:
Bateman owns a controlling interest in Netflix and uses the money to start his own movie studio, mostly churning out low-grade violent porn with himself as the star.

Receives a script about a serial killer who uses the seven sins as his MO and is interested, though the writers are unhappy with his idea that the film should feature a prominant soundtrack by Huey Lewis and The News.

Next: Mike and Trent[page-break]

 

Mike and Trent

The Character: Struggling LA actors who moves through the Swing-revival scene in 1990s Los Angeles, ruminating on life, love and the pursuit of beautiful babies.

2 Minutes After The Credits:
Trent hits on the woman with the baby, and gets digits. Mike shakes his head in disbelief, “You’re so money” he tells his womanizing friend.

2 Years After The Credits:
The boys attend Sue’s funeral after he dies in a gang shooting, shot with his own gun.

They play NHL Hockey on the Sega MegaDrive/Genesis in his memory, then bury it with him.

20 Years After The Credits: Mike is married to Heather Graham and they have an 18 year-old daughter. Trent, banned from ever talking to her until now, hits on her in a bar. She kicks him in the balls, rupturing one.

Next: Mathilda Lando[page-break]

 

Mathilda Lando

The Character: 12 year-old recent orphan looking to avenge her parents death at the hands of Gary Oldman. Mentored by hitman Leon, Mathilda learns the tricks of the trade and awaits her chance.

2 Minutes After The Credits: Mathilda kills a couple of older girls at the school for trampling over Leon’s plant.

2 Years After The Credits: Walking through the city one day, Mathilda saves the life of Mob boss Tony (Danny Aiello). He agrees to let her come work for him, and pays her installments of Leon’s fortune.

20 Years After The Credits:
Mathilda operates a successful business as a ‘cleaner’, doing only the hits she deems suitable, and training up new recruits she finds in orphanages.

Never having had a lover in the wake of her first love’s death, Mathilda decides she’d rather be with him and kills herself, donating her vast fortune to New York orphanages.

Next: Andy Dufresne and Ellis Boyd 'Red' Redding[page-break]

 

Andy Dufresne and Ellis Boyd 'Red' Redding

The Characters: Andy and Red are inmates at Shawshank prison in Massachusetts, and become firm friends over the course of their decades-long incarceration.

2 Minutes After The Credits: Red tells Andy he can’t swim, and has had a lifelong fear of the water, putting plans for a boat-tour company in serious jeopardy.

Andy promises to teach him how to swim, and they skip down the beach holding hands.

2 Years After The Credits: The pair are joined together in a non-legally binding commitment ceremony. Andy wears a dress. The sail to South America on a honeymoon.

20 Years After The Credits: With Red passed away from old age, Andy is left to operate their boat rental company, Mexico’s largest - turning over a million dollars a year – on his own.

He passes the time with a selection of young Mexican males he pays by the day, whom he chooses from a vast buffet every morning. After all, if you don't get busy living, you get really bored.

Who are your favourite movie characters and what were they doing after the credits rolled? Let us know!

 

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