The Cast of Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones (2002)

The Performance: Episode I has Neeson, and Episode III has Vader. Episode II has very little going for it.

Hayden Christiansen would be a good enough example on his own… if only it were that simple.

Why It’s Woody: Christiansen, Ewan McGregor and a cast of thousands are left to stumble over atrocious dialogue and green-screen confusion by a director too busy with CG and merchandising opportunites.

Refusing to learn the mistakes of Ep.1, notably eye-level errors when interacting with CG characters, and acting like a robotic shell of a cold-hearted bastard, Ep.2 expands on every flaw of its predecessor.

If The Performance Was A Tree: The forest moon of Endor. There isn’t a single form of flora, a single collection of plantlife or even a vast forest in a galaxy far, far away that is even remotely comparable.

The only way to fully do this atrocious example of group acting justice is to compare it to an entire tree-covered, Ewok-dwelling celestial body.

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