Ben Affleck
The Performance: Bounce (2000)
Why It’s Woody: Between Affleck and co-star Gwyneth Paltrow, this film has as much emotion as a log pile.
Any chemistry is lost in the gravity field created by Affleck’s chin, and his ability to add expression to his dialogue has been neutralised by Paltrow’s icy forcefield.
Not that we want to hate on them, you understand, they just make it too easy. Affleck was the bomb in Phantoms, though.
If The Performance Was A Tree: It would be hollow. When trees age the aptly titled ‘heartwood’ in the core of the trunk is often exposed to the elements or to insects, causing it to disappear.
This leaves a tree which can seem perfectly healthy and good looking from the outside completely hollow on the inside. Do the math.
See Also: Daredevil/Gigli/The Sum Of All Fears and er... Phantoms.
Next: Saffron Burrows
Comments
Ray Peterson
Aug 13th 2009, 12:28
Utah! Get me two!
Alert a moderator
ebrown2112
Aug 13th 2009, 14:22
Keanu Reeves exceptions: see "Permanent Record", "Thumbsucker", "River's Edge", "The Prince of Pennsylvania", "My Own Private Idaho".
Alert a moderator
ebrown2112
Aug 13th 2009, 14:23
Exception: Halle Berry, "Things We Learned In The Fire"
Alert a moderator
ashley.russell
Aug 14th 2009, 17:52
Reeves was also good in The Gift but Kate Holmes boobs will always be the most memorable thing about that movie.
Alert a moderator
captainspudnick
Aug 14th 2009, 19:55
how did you manage to do this list without the entire lifetime's work of Andie MacDowell! if you've seen 4 weddings, you'll know what i mean!
Alert a moderator
English47
Oct 9th 2011, 5:23
Paul Walker - Fast and Furious (and probably his entire career, but I haven't really entertained the idea of looking into his)
Alert a moderator