Legion

[Grinch11]

Legion - 2 star (coulda so easily been 1)

Every so often the studio marketing men truly earn their crust by bombarding our consciousness with some bombastic trailers, here hinting at an apocalyptic showdown in the skies, and would-be iconic posters, a ripped Paul Bettany sporting a machine gun and enormous wings. Who wouldn’t be in the queue for this one? Before joining the legions that will no doubt be lulled in by this serpents hiss of promise, heed the warnings of this review, Legion is far from angel delight.

God has unsurprisingly lost faith in mankind (understandable if he’d seen this) and decided that the only solution is to send his army of angels to Earth in order to start an apocalypse. The battleground for this final stand is a small derelict diner on the edge of nowheresville, who’s occupants will play a pivotal role in assisting defected angel Michael (Bettany) and his attempts to save mankind. The roll call of characters, so one dimensional that they disappear when viewed sideways, includes; the grumpy owner (Quaid), a trailer-trash pregnant girl (Palicki), her would be protector (Black), and the clichéd token black guy (Tyrese) amongst others.

Following the oft-used Hollywood cook book, Legion throws Terminator, Dawn of the Dead, and The Mist into a blender and delivers an abomination that’s not a patch on any of its influences.

Its Genesis is fine; a wonderful set-up that makes the most of the impending doom with some striking imagery – the swarm clouds at either end of the road leading from the diner are requisitely imposing, promising a serious threat that never really manifests. Bettany’s introduction is also effective, arriving like an archangel Arnie from Cameron’s classics, he is all monosyllabic mood, and the only problem is he never develops beyond that.

His performance is the biggest sin the film commits, given absolutely nothing to work with, his usual charisma is smothered by a need to substitute frowning for acting. But he’s Shakespearean compared to the laughable Black and the “going through the motions” Quaid.

Unable to decide what it wants to be, Legion veers from being a Zombieland clone in tone – a wickedly funny granny attack that prompts the line “the ***** just walked on the ceiling” – to a gloomy actioner that takes itself way too seriously, the intrusive soundtrack doesn’t help, before it finally settles into being a bog-standard zombie movie that’s more Rambo-esque than Romero.

And what of the angels? Michael has removed his own wings so he remains flightless, and the cloud based battle that was hinted at in the trailer is a poorly lit flashback that reveals the films budgetary limitations. Only when Kevin Durand’s Gabriel descends from the sky during the climax do we see anything different, but by then Legion is beyond Redemption.

[Kiba.]

A well written review, Mr Grinch. It confirms most of what I suspected when seeing the trailer and other reviews have also been critical.
I like Paul Bettany and generally try to see his work at the cinema but in this case and as it's not showing anywhere near me, I'll wait for DVD.

[thedude]

Excellent review. Lol, you have scuppered any thoughts I had of going to see this. Im also a huge Bettany fan like Kiba, Beer and Pizza with mates for this one I reckon.

[Zippykins1]

Good laugh for a night in with some drinks and takeaway. Starts off as enjoyable fun but kind of loses it towards the end.

[Ancient One]

I am hoping against hope that his new film Priest is not going to be a flop. Ive yet to see Legion and to be honest Im not rushing to see it either.

[Jonesy]

Legion was truly shite. I'm an admirer of Bettany's acting, but even he couldn't pull this one out of the cess pit. The set pieces were okay, but all those boring duologues...what were they all about. Films that are meant to be blatant popcorn fodder, shouldn't try and add philosophical and moralistic debate. It just makes the whole thing laughable.

[morris]

Originally Posted by Ancient One

I am hoping against hope that his new film Priest is not going to be a flop. Ive yet to see Legion and to be honest Im not rushing to see it either.

I wouldn't. It was even worse than I'd heard. Like you say, Priest had better be a big step up from this or I'll begin to think Betters is truly trying to sabotage his career. It's all very well saying the wirework is fun and you're having a blast shooting large guns, Mr B. But spare a thought for those of us who want you to return to films of quality plz Kthnx BAI.

[jaykays hat]

Legion

So glad I didn't blind buy this on dvd and waited for it to air on Sky movies.

Not a good film and why did the baby have to be saved? No mention of it in the film?

[Ancient One]

Legion

I believe there was actually a problem with the script on this one

It got made into a film.

[Jeffbiscuits]

Originally Posted by jaykays hat

Legion

So glad I didn't blind buy this on dvd and waited for it to air on Sky movies.

Not a good film and why did the baby have to be saved? No mention of it in the film?

I had read alright reviews and bad reviews of this so I thought it could be not bad. I spent my cash pounds on it and I absolutely despised it and then to make matters worse it was on Sky Movies a week later.
If Pirahna 3D is on Sky Movies next week I'm writing an angry worded letter to someone.