Pillaging Herman Melville’s classic Moby Dick, Ryan Little’s cut-price curio swaps marauding whales for dodgy CG fire-breathers and high-seas derring-do for six nobodies arguing in a tank.
An OTT Danny Glover heads up the cast as the vengeful Ahab (“Some say the white dragon let him live, others say he lost his mind!” runs the voiceover; we think the latter).
Joining him in the hunt for precious dragon vitriol (which powers the film’s mythical setting) is an unusually restrained Vinnie Jones.
Sadly, any car-crash appeal is undercut by the cardinal B-movie sin: dullness.
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