They told us that 1998's Halloween: H20 was going to be the end of the series. Michael Myers even had his head chopped off for good measure. But now the stab-happy killer's back for an eighth stalk `n' slash spree in the staggeringly formulaic franchise. The reason? Pure greed. H20 did better at the box office than anyone expected, proving that there's life in the old corpse yet. Even if he doesn't have a head.
After a ludicrous explanation of how Michael survived the fatal blow to his noggin, Halloween: Resurrection sets off to his hometown of Haddonfield, where an internet entrepreneur (Busta Rhymes) has convinced a group of fame-hungry teenagers to spend Halloween night in the old Myers house for a live web broadcast. Of course, no one's actually expecting The Shape to be there in person...
The original Halloween broke new cinematic ground by shooting sequences through the killer's eyes. Almost 25 years later, director Rick Rosenthal (the man who helmed the first sequel many moons ago) tries to cash in on the technique by giving everyone webcams, allowing him to cut back and forth between live action and Aliens-style CCTV footage. The result is a networked nightmare in which Michael kills and spills while characters e-mail each other helpful hints like: ""He's behind you!""
That's bad enough, but it gets worse. Unlike the recent Jason X, which made up for its brain-dead script with some hilarious death scenes, Halloween: Resurrection can't even manage to pull off a decent claret-stained money shot. An audacious nod to classic British serial killer flick Peeping Tom aside, Rosenthal handles the action with all the flair of a contributor to You've Been Framed, leaving us to ponder how any self-respecting director can fail to make a huge guy in a white mask carrying a ten-inch blade frightening. One thing's certain - - Halloween: Cremation would be a blessing for horror fans everywhere.
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John Carpenter's groundbreaker is sullied again, with a sequel lacking any glimmer of originality. This witless shocker plays more like April Fool's Day than Halloween. And the joke's definitely on us.