You can see them flogging this one over the first budget meeting at The Ivy. "There's this struggling Scottish soccer club... Managed by The Godfather's Robert Duvall. And he's talking to the club's owner... Michael Keaton. AKA Batman."
No, it's not the follow-up to the Comic Strip's Strike, just a silly-but-heartwarming remake of the David vs Goliath story set in the Scottish Second Division. Lowly Kilnockie have to beat Glasgow Rangers - or Keaton moves the team to Ireland. So Duvall signs fading star Ally McCoist - yes, the real one - who just happens to be Duvall's daughter's ex-hubby.
Imagine the EastEnders scriptwriters in charge of the FA Cup Final, and you'll know what to expect. Which, truth be told, ain't all that bad in a lowbrow kinda way. Shame about McCoist's 'acting', though.