It's baffling why some films go straight to DVD. Especially when they have name actors in the leads. Well, this baby has Elijah Wood in it (plus Franka Potente, Elizabeth Perkins, Mandy Moore and Deborah Harry) but, believe us, it's not hard to work out why it screeched into the multiplex pitstop.
All I Want is a dawdling fantasy that coasts along on Woods' rabbit-in-the-headlights appeal and little else. The idea, you see, is his wannabe-writer and self-confessed virgin moves into a rambling apartment block with a bunch of kooky individualists (Potente's a photographer, Moore's an actress...). Relationships form, friendships blossom, but nothing really happens.
Sound intriguing? Not when the nothing really happening is this boring. Someone should tell director Jeffrey Porter that yes, you can successfully sideline plot in favour of characters (hell, that's Sofia Coppola's career). But you have to make the characters entice. This bunch of narcissistic caricatures couldn't entice a spaniel with a chocolate biscuit.