Half Past Dead


A group of Matrix extras bust into a reopened Alcatraz to extract a criminal mastermind from the island prison. Unluckily for them, FBI fat-man Steven Seagal is on undercover overtime...

Basically, it's Under Siege all over again, with the boat replaced by the slammer and the good bits replaced by... Well, not very much at all.

Presumably having served most of his sentence sat in the prison's pie shop, Seagal sensibly sticks to firing his big guns and trying to act cool like hip-hop buddy Ja Rule. Half Past Dead is really just a big, silly, music video, but the high production values and a pair of super-sleek villains somehow manage to lift it out of the turkey farm. Just.

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